Coming Out

Coming out is the process by which individuals accept their own gay, lesbian or bisexual identity, homosexual/bisexual orientation or transgendered nature, and then let friends and family members know about this aspect of themselves. Most people come out to others in order to lead more open and honest lives without the constant fear of being discovered that accompanies remaining in the closet.

Coming out in Indian and other Asian contexts is often complicated by the huge emphasis on conventional gender roles, heterosexual marriage and on begetting progeny to perpetuate the family line. Sure, these issues exist in other (non-Asian) contexts as well, but it is helpful for us and our families to hear accounts of people from our cultures, and in terms familiar to us. Check out our Coming out Stories page.

Tips on Coming out:

• Evaluate your readiness
• Test the waters
• Keep resources ready
• Plan and rehearse
• Have a ‘disaster recovery’ plan
• Don’t blame yourself for failure
• Not a one shot deal

Resources:

• Coming out stories of MP members
• Check out Trikone Magazine’s 1997 Coming Out issue.
• Singapore-based queer women’s group Sayoni released a booklet on coming out as part of their IndigNation pride events in August 2009. You can download a pdf version here.

This post is also available in: தமிழ் (Tamil)